Talkin' John Ashcroft Paranoid Blues

 

In 1966, Bob Dylan came up with a song entitled "Talkin' John Birch Paranoid Blues." I do have a later version of the song is included in "The Bootleg Series" - but this does not include the verse about Hitler, for which Bob Dylan was booted out of a TV studio. An older recording with all the verses was once available on an unpublished album that was given to the audience present at one of his early concerts in New York.

The appropriateness of using precisely this song by Dylan and applying it to John Ashcroft and the war on terrorism is that it addresses the paranoia of McCarthyism that found its further development in the John Birch Society. Another thing that makes this very interesting - very interesting indeed, in fact - is what Dylan spelled out in that "taboo" verse about Hitler and the Holocaust: The intimate connection between far-right anti-Semitism and the Communist witch hunt! Think about it. In the 1930's, the Nazis, along with nationalists and fascists of other European nations, succeeded in raising the fear among the masses against the Bolshevik-Zionist Conspiracy. Communism and Jewry were seen as one and the same threat; they were interconnected and inter-related, and this paranoia of conspiracy revived its head in America during the McCarthy and John Birch years.

Well, take a close look at John Ashcroft and his far-right ties to white supremacists of the good old South. I think it's highly appropriate to give this Dylan classic a little face-lift, just for the fun of it:

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Talkin' John Ashcroft Paranoid Blues

(adapted from Bob Dylan)

Well, I was feelin' sad and feelin' blue,
I didn't know what in the world I was gonna do,
Them Terrorists they wus comin' around,
They wus in the air,
They wus on the ground.
They wouldn't gimme no peace. . .

So I run down most hurriedly
And joined up with the John Ashcroft Society,
I got me a secret membership card
And started off a-walkin' down the road.
Yee-hoo, I'm a real John Ashcrofter now!
Look out you Terrorists!

Now we all agree with Hitlers' views,
Although he killed six million Jews.
It don't matter too much that he was a Fascist,
At least you can't say he was a Terrorist!
That's to say like if you got a cold you take a shot of malaria.

Well, I wus lookin' everywhere for them gol-darned Moles.
I got up in the mornin' 'n' looked in the holes,
Looked in the sink, behind the door,
Looked in the glove compartment of my car.
Couldn't find 'em . . .

I wus lookin' high an' low for them Moles everywhere,
I wus lookin' in the sink an' underneath the chair.
I looked way up my chimney hole,
I even looked deep inside my toilet bowl.
They got away . . .

Well, I wus sittin' home alone an' started to sweat,
Figured they wus in my T.V. set.
Peeked behind the picture frame,
Got a shock from my feet, hittin' right up in the brain.
Them Moles caused it!
I know they did . . . them hard-core ones.

Well, I quit my job so I could work alone,
Then I changed my name to Sherlock Holmes.
Followed some clues to find seditious quotes
And discovered terrorist threats in general Washington's notes!
That ol' Betty Ross . . .

Well, I investigated all the books in the library,
Ninety percent of 'em gotta be burned away.
I investigated all the people that I knowed,
Ninety-eight percent of them gotta go.
The other two percent are fellow Ashcrofters . . . just like me.

Now Eisenhower, he's a Russian spy,
Lincoln, Jefferson and that Roosevelt guy.
To my knowledge there's just one man
That's really a true American: George Gordon Liddy.
I know for a fact he hates Terrorists cus he picketed the musical Hair.

Well, I fin'ly started thinkin' straight
When I run outa things to investigate.
Couldn't imagine doin' anything else,
So now I'm sittin' home investigatin' myself!
Hope I don't find out anything . . . hmm, great God!

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Original lyrics:

http://bobdylan.com/songs/birch.html

Copyright © 1970 Special Rider Music

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America's Thought Police

America's Leading Racist Fascist

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